When to Shut Up?

The abundant vacation has led my mind to wander about fuzzy, inconclusive topics. Speaking of vacation, right after a tedious post graduate course, everyone must think I am in the Bahamas! Nope, I stayed home, worked out, learnt to drive a car and allowed my mouth to continuously jabber to people which got me thinking “When to Shut Up”?

I used to think letting people talk hideous stuff and still get away, had to be confronted. I used to think this was called “standing up for myself”. Long long ago (I do not have the faintest idea when) I had visited a temple. I do not have the habit of keeping a bindi on my forehead, genuinely because I am allergic, neither do I believe in Satan haunting me. A priest who probably had a rough morning back home, stood in front and questioned me “oh my goodness, you are at a temple, how could you NOT have a bindi”. Then he looked at my mother and scorned like she was responsible for this mess. Now this triggered the individualistic side of my brain and I replied “Are you telling me I am not allowed here otherwise? Did God tell you so?”. This took him aback and he murmured something under his breath and took off, ONLY to ask the next girl in line why she had not kept a bindi!  Not to change his beliefs and stop looking at mothers and daughters that way. If I had known this earlier, I would have given him my stupidest smile and walked away – it could have saved so much of my energy! Believe me, we do not live in an individualistic society where what we say gets into bird brains and makes a difference to the planet as such. Just smirk, walk away and eat the prasadham.

Now shutting up in this situation does not necessarily mean you are handing over the power to the other person in front of you. I believe in 3 mantras that have kept me going for the past 5 years (considering that’s when we start understanding) Firstly, we do not have any power or control of what people think about us. Second, it doesn’t matter at all what they believe in. Third, if you think you are doing the right thing, who cares?

So, I gave you a very traditional priest & me story that most of you have probably heard previously.  (Yes, I talk a lot to my friends). Learning to shut up also means an awful lot of listening. Let’s say you and your friends are out on a Saturday evening to enjoy cocktail hour. One of your single friends opens up and tells you that they are having feelings for a married person.  This is a very spit-in-the-cocktail-and-run-away moment for everyone. Predominantly, we would spontaneously react with an “are you crazy” face and give out spot advise and prescriptions to the poor soul who gathered their gut to tell us the truth. This is exactly the right time to listen to what they have to say, although it feels preposterous. Going down the judgmental road is going to push your friends farther away from you. All they wanted was for someone to listen to them & then go about hearing how you feel.

Trust me, we ALL know what we are doing. If they need to be straightened out, they will ask for it. Do not judge. Do not shove them away. Shut up because, Friends are the family you make for yourself 😊

Based on my previous gatherings, I can tell you this – it is definitely not our job to fill in awkward pauses or silences. It’s alright, give it a rest, hear the plates clatter together! I was once in a crowded party sitting in a table of 8 where 7 of them were new to me. I was dreading the fact that I had agreed to join them as conversations were mostly among themselves filled with long pauses in between.  I did try a humorous pitch once and no one even smiled! (grumpy mornings?) Maybe some of us do not have a witty tongue, maybe we don’t fit in there, maybe they like those awkward silences, why even try to talk when we can eat? (unless it’s a million-dollar deal or something)

All I’m asking is -When you do have an option of Netflix and Chill, sleep or binge eat, why would you choose to talk relentlessly in such situations? Are people going to change their belief systems? Even if they do, are they going to accept that to you? Do really what “others” think matter to you in the tiniest of situations? Think about it… Every person is different, we all need to learn to co-exist and remember that life is too short to stop chilling when you CAN! So shut up, grab a drink, read a book, enjoy the weather and your life!

(Here’s a tip: Think of the stupid ones around as Rachel’s Thanksgiving Beef Trifle and say “Mmmhhh” and give them that smile back. You can still toss it out the window like Chandler did! It really works for me (:)

The Constant Battle

Always a brimming beaker,
Indeed, a conspicuous error
Oblivious to the plethora of ubiquity,
Excoriates the perennial purity


Priceless as it was,
Although not for every Tom Dick and Harry
It stood majestically,
Crafted of crystal lucidity


Maybe it deserved a crack or two,
Coz of the naïve quality
Envisaging no mends,
The brimming beaker rose with bends


Probably it should seal its lip,
For there was no right fit
The mind battles, but the heart whispers…
Try a lil harder, it sniggers…












x

A Tale to Tell..

It all began with an innocent game

Little did I know the thoughts would trail

A grin slips by my mind

When memories rumbled through

Here I am now, clueless and mushy

Dazed to my wits end.

The bygone and the present smirked at me

Like it was all meant to be.

It was funny though

The erroneous dots I thought to be so

The aura will always remain a mystery

‘Coz what we share is beyond than just …

Okay I don’t want to be cheesy 😊

Oblivious to what’s next...

Like a kite sailing through the sky

Now I know this is how it should feel…

Buoyant and zestful

'Coz camouflaging into none

And mirroring your veracity

Is… something to hold onto 😊

The Silhouette of Memories

Prologue:

Warning : This post is going to be huge .

College.There it was ,with its gates wide open ,welcoming me to its abode .I descend from the bus and look around. A sense of warmth surrounds me .I smile and start walking in towards the bustling lane of students and staff. I reach my class and there is a tall and beautiful woman with a glint of joy in her eyes . I had taken a liking towards her at first sight. She was my class coordinator. 

And that's how it all began

Chapter 1-The first.

BEEP! That was my college bus honking its arrival at my boarding point ! Panting,I boarded the yellow painted vehicle. I had slept an extra ten minutes and ended up running to my stop. Numerous fresh faces greeted me with a wave . Yawning and half asleep, I was ,until I reached my class.

Chitter chatter and laughter could be heard across the entire hall. That was EEE-B . We had earned the "worst class" badge bang on.  I sat amongst my newly found friends and we began the day's chore of consistent talking and pointless giggling . At recess, it was a tradition to celebrate every person's birthday with the cake cutting ceremony. Gifts were presented,smiles were exchanged and happiness filled the warm classroom.

One fine day dawned upon us .It was the festival of colors,Holi. Color powder and splash rockets were smuggled into college . Secret glances and winks were exchanged from row to row. It was only after the working hours ,did the fun begin ! Everyone grew wild with joy and excitement ,smearing color onto every passer-by . It took only a while to realize that all of us looked like human rainbows . The colorful day was wrapped up with a group photograph and a memory to cherish forever.

All this fun comes with a tag-the semester exams. Worried faces and constant prayers were trending.Our first experience with the famous Anna University semester exams were frightening as warned by our seniors. Yet , we all ended up with good results .(No clue how!)

It was all about socializing and adapting to the new environment. This was where we all belonged. We had learnt to love it . Everyone was happy with everything .The first year had greeted us very well indeed.

Chapter 2 - The senior feel

One year had glided by . We had finally passed the junior stage and had become a part of the department. Getting to know seniors became an important agenda. This helped us bunk classes and gain a wider friends circle. New subjects and respective laboratory sessions kept us occupied. Involving in department activities and events were important , more than studying.

Then came the most awaited college event . The symposium. This meant wearing a saree .Almost as much as it freaked me out , there was definitely a tinge of excitement. Classes were dismissed . Decoration work went on all day. Sticky business ,crafty ideas and painting was the buzz for the week ahead. On the day of Spangles , the symposium , everyone hovered around excitedly . Boys were dressed smart . Girls carried themselves elegantly in a saree. Seniors kept bustling around with the workload they had . Facebook profile pictures were clicked . Event registrations were made. Students from colleges all over Chennai visited to participate. The whole place looked festive . The aroma of biriyani floated through the air to target our nostrils . Everyone grabbed a plate to slurp their way to lunch. The beautiful day ended with a photograph of our family (EEE-B) , beaming our way through!


Now that the culturals hooplah had gotten over, we were all back to the monotony of tests every morning. You could hear the groaning of students all across the campus . But that did not last long. The elections for various posts within the department came up . There were nominations filed in a jiffy, campaigning done and posters chalked out ! The frenzy of real time elections caught the air ! A lot of ego surfaced within the candidates , nonetheless , it all ended in a blissful manner.

With the exposure to pranks , endless bunking and a lot of friends , the senior year glided by joyfully.


Chapter 3- The Pre-Finalists

However terrifying the name sounded, we were all still children at heart. The day we stepped into our classrooms for the fresh year ahead, we were already day dreaming on the College Tour!! Plans and itenaries were being sketched out. "This place is awesome dude ," said one guy. "Are you bonkers? This place has only tea gardens to walk on ", said another. After about half a million suggestions, we finally came up with Munnar as the holy destination . Of course,  grown-ups are hard to convince. It took a while for all the parents and faculty to finally let us go.

HOOOOOT!! That was the train siren blowing !! The halls decked with music and glory ! The tapping of our feet and funny dance movements made the night swiftly go by. The chill of air swept our faces . It was a chilly morning outside Cochin's railway station. We carried ourselves sleepily across the road to find our buses waiting to take us to Munnar. It was a long journey ahead and we all snored our way through. Until, there was a very loud crashing noise that jerked our heads up in shock ! The rains had made a huge tree fall flat on the bus's windshield ! The trip had finally started off with an adventure ! We moved to another bus rather tired, and made it to Munnar around mid-afternoon ! Whew, that was a lot for a day !

The two days in Munnar went by happily with a lot of togetherness and adventure. The rains splattered on continuously doubling the amount of fun we were already having. The time came , to rush to WonderLa !!! A fabulous piece of Man's creation, I'd say !! The Monster ride sat there , welcoming us all at the entrance of the park. All of us rushed to the Monster in excitement. Little did we know , that we would be left triple-dazed by the end of the ride ! The Monster swung its carriages through at every possible direction leaving us all screaming in fright and frenzy ! We held onto our dear lives and gladly stepped out of the ride when it had stopped its lunatic behaviour !

That was just the start of the day at WonderLa ! Mascots greeted us here and then, bringing a smile upon everyone's tired face . Water rides gave us an adrenaline push ! All of us were lost in a world of glory , innocence and memories. It was now time to go home.

The placement scare had already started dementing a few. Numerous forms were being filled , GPA's being calculated with the examinations just around the corner.

The Pre-Final year, just as it sounded, was going to be the second last year we were all going to be together as a family.

Chapter 4- The Finals -The Epilogue

This is probably my most hated year. I was going to be ripped away from a family. We were all going to travel in different directions and separated by realms of reality. It was time we flew out of our nests to face the ugly world .

Interviews and tests were scheduled. We were being turned into professionals. Gestures were practised. Parents and teachers were having the time of their lives. Advises and lectures were rambled on . We were tired of hearing the monotony of  words - 'career','placement','higher studies','settling down','pride' and the list could go on for eternity.

We sat under the pale lights of the auditorium, blanketed by the cold night air . It was half past nine. Tension ruled over the audience. We were awaiting our results from the interview. The Vice-Principal's voice over the microphone sent a chill down our spine. That moment was the most decisive moment of our lives. Most of us had gotten through and erupted in joy ! Hugs were exchanged. A sense of relief flooded our faces. We could now get back to being normal humans , we thought .

Little did we realise that the final year project was going to take a toll on us as well . Teams were split among ourselves. We had to think of a whole new idea to replicate our learning on Electronics practically. It was as monstrous as it sounded, yes. Just as expected, our ideas were rejected during the first review.

The project phase was exhaustive as it sounded ! Few of us had to write it as a Journal as well , thanks to our hyper active guides. The Viva sessions, as depicted by our seniors, were definitely the biggest nightmare. We were baffled by the techie questions that were shot through during our reviews. The "Aah's and Umm's of the English language, though frowned upon, came in handy then.

We crawled our way through the final review and landed on a more devastating day - The Farewell. Our juniors, such darlings, gave us a wonderful gift to take back home. A colorful calendar that showed each of our classmate's birthday with their photo on it. They had also arranged this perfect gathering that made us all more nostalgic than ever. Selfies, journals, diaries and tears were exchanged.

A huge group photograph was the last piece to complete the jigsaw puzzle.

 A family of friends, 68 shoulders to lean upon and a silhouette of memories. That was college for me.

Cinema...Not just an entertainer!

Hollywood ,Bollywood ,Kollywood and so much more ! The field of Cinema is an ocean filled with creativity!

 Ranbir Kapoor ,Shah Rukh Khan ,Marlyn Brando ,Kamal Haasan ,8 pack ,6 pack ... Fantasizing a future girlfriend , the dance we do in a pub or the music u listen to when you're low ..springs you back into action ! Where do all these come from ? C.I.N.E.MA! 

So one of you around is a "hermit" and don't give importance to this .And you're exhausted on topics to talk about .Cinema will give you loads to talk about . Just a simple example ! 

There are people out there who are trying to provide us with entertainment , so we can get a break from our daily routines once in a blue moon ! Who would ever do that ?! They ought to get their respect and honour !

A well-known actor Kamalhaasan had to face disastrous happenings because of Viswaroopam just because there were Muslims on screen ! So is he supposed to take the film with THE SMURFS or Bugs Bunny ?? Cinema potrays reality ! It is for those narrow minded ones who live in fear to face the dirty world ! Cinema could provide  a REVOLUTION  out here ,if it were taken seriously ! Sadly, people are reigned to their thoughts and don't know to appreciate the good .

Dhanush

Actor Dhanush , a mere simple guy who had no background or prosperity . He has toiled so hard to be who he is today ! Right from Thuluvadho ilamai to Mariyaan , there is SO much life in his acting ! I ,personally was very moved by his performance in "3" ! Who could give so much of emotions in front of a camera knowing it is unreal ?  A REAL ARTIST could ! His passion , his success...from where he was to where he is now ..is commendable ! But what do we hear ? "He looks sick , he's got no  muscles " . Give me a break people ! Learn to appreciate ! 

Selvaraghavan

Directors ...another reason for artists to become successful..who create this magical world ..yet full of reality and potray it to us magnificently ! Again , it has become quite easy for the mere audience to criticise the creativity ! Cinema is ALSO  a field where millions of them have passion and are striving to taste success ! 

Gain a broader perspective and sit in theatres to LEARN the good and revolutionarise the world ! 

Again ...Cinema ..not just an entertainer ! An eye opener in many :) ! 

LONELY

Hidden from happiness
Down in the shades of sorrow
Constantly thinking...Having noone next to you
Is the meaning of being lonely

A shoulder to lean upon
One finger to wipe my tears
A friend who is there for me
Till my last breath ..is what i ask you for

They say nothing lasts forever
And i see what they said now
I should really go see some friends
But they dont really comprehend

All i need is someone
Who makes me wanna sing
Show me that Love is true
Show me that Wonders can be true

   


Wish to see a Chandler
And become as sarcastic as a Bing!
Wish to see a Monica or Rachel
And be best friends like them
Wanna see Pheebs
And be called a weirdo

Wanna see a Joey or a Ross
And become seven of them!

If God ever grants me a wish.... I would ask for F.R.I.E.N.D.S!

D.A.D.D.Y

He bought me into this world
He made me feel safe in his arms
He gave me warmth and confidence
He is D.A.D.D.Y

Riding along in his bike
Gave me the best smile
Not any Barbie dolls,not any teddy bears
Just Daddy made me happy


He showed me what the world is
He protected me safe in his arms
Carried me along everywhere
He truly loved his child

(the lines below are from the bottom of my heart to you)

Daddy,
You are the most amazing person I have met! You have walked with me in my path of life ...never letting go off my hand. As a child ,I asked you why I have no siblings and you told me that I am the only princess whom you want to love and care forever! I have hurted you too many times but you have never....ever stopped loving me! You have been my kith and kin throughout but now..... you are moving away ...far away from me! I wont get used to life without u Daddy! Come back soon dad:(

You are the best gift god has ever given me

Miss u daddy:(

The Road Not Taken

No No...I am not writing the original poem..I am interpreting the stuff in it!

"The Road" ...here symbolises the path you want to take in life.In this modern era everyone wishes to take a common path...a path which is usually travelled by everyone...for eg-software engineering.Y? because:-

1. they reach their destination sooner than they imagined
2. they are assured of safety
3. less hurdles

These days people take up a job just because they are guaranteed a good salary and can lead a decent life.They might actually not even be interested in the job opportunity they got!

Money is not everything in life...it can get us most of our wants..true..but there are infinite things that money can't get too!!

Considering the road less travelled,I would actually like to say that it is far more interesting and better!

1. Its usually unsafe
2. You can reach your destination after 10 yrs only
3. No scope in life

All that is CRAP!!! I strongly believe that if you are interested in that field and you aim for it ...then the road not taken would be a cakewalk!!

Don't ever let your mind wander away to other people's words...FIGHT FOR WHAT YOU WANT....AIM...BREAK THE BARRIER...ACHIEVE...!!!!!!!

You never know ...you could even lead a better life than the people who travelled the common route..its a promise!!

If you are actually afraid of not heeding others words....in other words..if you are a goody-goody....then I would say this..

"Do two things the way you want in life

1. your career-you can achieve things only when you love doing them...so take care
2. your love life-you can only live with a person only when you truly love him or her ....and of course he/she should love you too!!(will be explained in forthcoming topics)

So take care....GOOD LUCK GUYS AND GIRLS!!!